Getting Ready for Middle School

As we stand by the door, ready to part ways, I know how you feel.   You may not believe me, but it is true.   You look hesitantly to the door.  The other side holds the unknown, something bigger, something new.   I see it in your eyes, you are processing what that new unknown could look like. 

I know from experience what is on the other side of that door.   It is bigger, it is new, and yes, there is a part that is unknown.... even for me.   But it will be good, I can tell you that.   Today those doors look scary but I promise you this, soon, crossing those doors will be easy.  Soon, you will not be hesitant, you will be confident with brand new experiences under your belt.   You will be a different person than you are today.  

The other side of those doors offer you the opportunity to learn, to grow, to develop new ideas, and new thoughts.    You will learn about the world and you will learn about yourself.  You will meet new people, some who will support you, some who will challenge you, and some who won't treat you well.   All of this is exciting and at the same time scary for me as well.

You probably think this is easy for me to leave you by the doors of this place.   You probably think I walk away and don't think about how you are doing amid a sea of new faces and personalities.   I know it feels that your friends are not near right now, I feel that for you.  But I know you will shine as you have done though the years.   You are strong and steadfast with a lot to offer these new acquaintances.

No, it is not easy for me to leave you at these doors with so many unknowns.  Will it always be easy, no.  Definitely not.   Will there be bumps in the road, absolutely.   Will we get through it?  I have no doubt.   I cannot wait to see the friends you make, the interests you pursue, and the person you will be come. 

As we part ways, I tell you I am praying for you.   And I am.   I pray that you see that almost everyone sitting next to you is feeling the same thing.   You are not the only one who is apprehensive.    I am praying that you will encouraged and excited.   I am also  praying that the wonderful person that God made you to be shines though so that others can see how wonderful I know you are.

A "New Normal"

My "new normal" as a friend put it.    I couldn't have picked a better way to describe life and the amazing amount of changes that happened to our family in the month of May.   Despite that we are in the second half of the month of June, I find that I am still trying to get a grasp on what our "new normal" will look like.

I don't know if I can totally process all of the changes, and some of it will be just going to the motions until it becomes routine.   Then the "new normal" will just be "normal".   Perhaps I am struggling because as I tend to do, I have put myself on a schedule.  As I get ready for the day today, I ask myself, "How can I put myself on a schedule to process this information?"   I can't.   Maybe that is why my mind won't move forward.  

Working full-time.  After eleven years of being self employed, and working various part-time jobs, I find that I am searching.   Searching for what life will now look like.  I know where I am at is part of His plan.   How could it not be?   The timing, the open doors, everything falling into place so easily.   Truthfully I am very fortunate, and I know that.  But, a small part of me feels that some things I was excited about and passionate about are now on hold or will never happen. What do I do with those now?

Michal Zacharzewski, SXC

At this stage of the game, I don't see how the two will gel, the plans I had before and the way my life seems to be going now.  Who knows, perhaps there is a way that this step leads me in the direction of those passions and plans.   Maybe those plans where "my" plans and not "His" plans? 

I know His timing is always perfect.   And I find comfort in the fact that in looking back over my life, He has always prepared me for the next step.   I didn't always realize it at the time, but He ever so gently took my hand and walked ahead of me paving the way to where I am today.

So as I sit here, with questions and curiosity about the next step, feeling like there is a change of direction in my life, I know that He is preparing me for the future.  I may not completely know or totally understand what that looks like, but I do know without a doubt, that when I do reach that next step, I will look back to today and know that this was part of His plan, and I will be so grateful for this part of the journey.

Three Days

What a gift my sister gave us when she called and asked us if we could watch the girls for three days.   The days have been full of laughter, playing, smiles, but most importantly cousin bonding time.

Thank you, dear sister, for giving us time to enjoy and love your girls for a few days!   

Breathe

As the day has progressed, there is one constant thought or feeling that encompasses the whole day.  Breathe.   While the sun is shining in sky which is the shade of blue that I love most, the breeze is blowing.   The wind chimes are singing their songs, the breeze is taking away the stresses and pressure that has been building up for the past few weeks.  I can breath again.   It is not the hurried, quick inhale of breath to get me to the next appointment, event, or activity.   No, it is the deep inhale that brings in the calm and the cleansing exhale that takes the tense, frantic, frazzled feelings away. 

We spent the morning catching up on cleaning the house, something that really needed to be done.   As order came to the stacks of papers, and dust was lifted off the surfaces, I felt like I was able to breathe.   Laundry is now caught up and I was able to even do a few extra loads that are not part of the mountain of clothes that I face every week, and I began to breathe a little more easily.  

The humidity that was present this morning moved out with the breeze and we opened the windows allowing the fresh air and bird's song to fill the house.   Again I breathe.    I couldn't stay indoors today, it was just to beautiful and I have spent the past three weeks indoors.   I need to get outside, so we took a blanket, settle under our tree, and read.  I was now able to relax.   





My kids have had healthy meals and snacks today.   It feels good to know that their bodies are being fueled the proper way with nutrients they need to grow and function on rather than the hurried convenience foods of the past weeks.   Another breath of fresh air fills my lungs.  

Today, beginning the week that I have been looking forward to for a long time, was everything that I needed and wanted it to be.   A day spent with my children, relaxing, and just being together.